Speechless – but still hanging around.
Its very rare that I have nothing to say – when your mind goes completely blank and there is absolutely nothing you want to write yet I scribble things here because I realise I haven’t been here for a while 🙂 and pouring your heart out is needed to keep you sane.
2020 has been a very sad year for all of us. I wanted to visit here and pour my heart out when my mumma left us in June, but everything happened so surprisingly that there is “still” absolutely nothing to express. Tears roll down the eyes even today but it does not express the pain that the heart feels. Why? I guess not, because life is and never will be the same anymore. And it is extremely hard to explain what I am going through.
I am sure once I get my senses right ( may be some day ) I will have a lot to say about the day I spoke to my mum last and the day she passed away. I do not have the strength to look back at that day .. yet. You can console the entire world for the pain, you can help every single individual in this world and bring them out of their sorrows but how do you get stronger yourself when you have had one of the scariest years of your life.
Just looking forward to meet my loved ones when everything is safe to travel and spend some time with them to go through what has happened.
I will be back.
Dika, as my mum called me.